The Dream Ticket

The Setting: What would have happened if Barack Obama had chosen Hillary Clinton as his running mate? What would John McCain have had to do to beat an Obama / Clinton ticket?

McCain: "Jesus, I need your help!"
Jesus: "What do you need, Scott? No… Tom! Wait, who are you again?"
McCain: "It’s John! You remember me. Come on…"
Jesus: "Let me open these blinds. Oh yeah, I see it now. OK, I'm good. What can I help you with?"
McCain: "It's about this whole Obama / Clinton thing."
Jesus: "Yes, I've heard about it."
McCain: "I need your help. Obama / Clinton is the Dream Ticket. I don't think there is any ticket that will be strong enough to beat them. Obama / Clinton will beat anybody I could bring. There's McCain / Huckabee, but let's face it: he even scares the hell out of me."
Jesus: "Me, too!"
McCain: "A McCain / Powell ticket could've come close, but Colin said no."
Jesus: "Can't say I blame him."
McCain: "So I got to thinking. What ticket could possibly beat Obama / Clinton? And then it came to me. Picture it: McCain / Christ."
Jesus: "Don’t you mean Christ / McCain?"
McCain: "Aw, come on. I've already gotten the presidential nomination. I just need a running mate. But I just can't beat that Obama / Clinton ticket."
Jesus: "Well, neither can I. Besides, I'm an Independent. Security!"